Lets set our hearts at self destruct.

how come i didnt get the memo that it was cool for girls to have worse potty mouthes than 45 year old rednecks from alabama who sit in their trailers with their buddies and drink natty's and fart and scratch their balls and admire each others burps? did anyone else get the memo? since when is it nearly attractive to hear girls talk about "cocks cumming in your ass" or something such as that? whats that all about? people are retarded. i want to move. girls up here are so petty and gross and cloned.

oh and another thing...to all the myspace lame-o's.... im sorry kiddos, but no one really cares about your new song, or layout, or blog, or picture, or haircut, or piercing, or tattoo. this myspace shit is just a bunch of petty people trying to make up for the popularity they cant have in real life, so they try to do it on there. go do something better with your lives than sitting in front of your little fake myspace environment with your awesomely fake friends who more than likely talk shit behind your back but then go and leave comments telling you youre hot or pretty. myspace turned so gay. if youre searching for a way to make yourself feel loved or happy, or important go buy a fucking dog.

this weekend will be wonderful [besides my closing shift on saturday, where i will have to wait on a tour bus of 50 people. AHHHHH!] but other than that, its great:

-W.A.S.'s first show!! :] and the following people are coming up with me: MICHELLE! BETH! CHRIS! ZACK! SEIF! LEANNE! ASHLEY! RACHAEL! WAAHOO! fantastic!!

and yes, i said MICHELLE AND ZACK since they are coming home... finally... for the weekend!

I saw Mark and Ann this morning and i was also informed JULIE is coming down for the weekend too! I am rather excited!!

except im super sick. ew. oh well though, it will still be amazing.



but its time to write. bye.

i am never 100% sure about stuff. and i am absolutely sick of it.
cant a higher being somewhere give me a fucking sign or something?
decisions. decisions. decisions.

i mean. im pretty sure of some stuff.
but are these things good things? will they benefit my life?
sometimes i wish i wouldnt have fucked up and left boston.
i would be 3/8 the way through college right now.
3 fucking 8ths. right now i am pretty much 1/8.
i shouldnt be.
i should make a lot of money one day.
i could do that.
if i felt like it.

[edit: dont get me wrong... i really really had to leave boston,
and i still think it was a good decision. and it helped me greatly.
i just know i am ready to go back. and i wish i would have been
ready the first time].

do you understand what its like to be remembered for the following:
-intelligent
-conciencious
-dilligent
-respectful
-blessed with athletic abilities
-blessed with artistic abilities

then what?
i can still be all of these things.
but i havent been in a while.

how do you go back to something like this?
i want to:
-use my intelligence
-reclaim my dilligence
-get in better shape
-go back to school to study art, or even just create something with my abilities!!
do you know how long it has been since i have spent more than a half an hour on an art piece?
far too long.



so, for the new year... i resolve to become all of these [again].

We went to the Zoo yesterday. I took a bunch of ( Pictures )